Hi Ya'll

And welcome to The Crippled Mockingbird blog spot. This is my very first attempt at being a blogger. I will be scanning the internets to bring to you the true, the weird, the strange and the just plain damn stupid, and from where I'm sitting, there's plenty of it out there. If in my quest for information I manage to embarrass, annoy, offend, or just plain piss somebody off, then my job is done.

Today, it's raining here at the old Flying Turtle Farm. All the goats are huddling in their little goat sheds, trying to decide if it's going to be cold enough tonight to drop their kids. My husband is trying to fix the washing machine. He's got a manual. And tools. And so far hasn't had to make one trip to hardware store. I think the aliens have replaced him with a pod person.

I turned 50 in October and I'm kinda having a midlife crisis. One of these days I'm going to have to grow up, it just isn't going to be today. I live in the middle of nowhere, in Tylertown, Mississippi, home of rednecks, retards, Katrina refugees who I wish would go back to New Orleans and stay there, Southern Baptists, Pentecostals, good old boys, good old girls, more ministers from more religions than you can shake a stick at, and me. With the exception to the aforementioned Katrina refugees who I really wish would go back to New Orleans, like it's been nearly 4 years already, go home, I'm related to damn near everyone in the county, by blood or marriage, and that includes the black ones that no one else in the family wants to admit to. I mean it's so bad that I had to import a husband from California. I don't care if it is legal, dating your first cousin is just gross.

My daddy is 89 years old and still thinks he can drive. My auntie, his baby sister, is 79 and still thinks she can drive. Good that both of them ended up buying the same kind of car. Folks around here have that old pattern recognition thing going own. For their own safety, every time they see a brown Mercury Marquis, they automatically give them the right of way. When the two of them are not arguing, they are doing their best to put me in the nervous hospital. Got news for them, as long as they're making Zanex, I ain't going nowhere.

Anyhow, looks like I need to get to making dinner. Gonna have to post this link somewhere and have folks stop in and read all this stuff. I figure it'll be great evidence for my sanity hearing.

Ta-Ta for now, ya'll.