Stuff I Do When I Am Bored

Today I got his in my email, from the UK Lottery commission.

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Email Won
Thursday, January 29, 2009 3:54 PM
From:
"Uk National Lottery" info-uklottery@fuse.net
YOUR EMAIL WON 820,000 POUNDS, CONTACT MRS.SHERRY COLE FOR FURTHER INFO ON (mrsherrycole@hotmail.com)
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Since I haven't been to the UK, and since I don't remember buying any lottery tickets, it is obvious that this is a scam.

I am gonna have ever so much fun with these folks.....

This was my reply:

hey! ya'll said i just won some money, which is real odd cause i don't remember entering any contest, but what the hell, these days any money is good, only i want american dollars not brit pounds. let me know when ya'll are sending my check, cause i am gonna get good and drunk and party my ass off....
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That should get their attention. The last time I did something like this, it was from the Nigerians and I kept it going for about a month. I think they finally got disgusted and quit.

I will update this post as soon as Mr. Sherry Cole replies. And if that's not a clue this is scam, I don't know what is. What kind of an idiot would name their son 'Sherry'.

Hey there boys and girls! I'm back.

I don't know if it is possible to be creative when you feel like you've just been ran over by a herd of goats, but I'm going to give it a shot.

I spent most of today in a walk in visit at the Jackson VA. Wish I could say I enjoyed the visit, except I didn't. I have an ear and throat infection that is making me miserable.

Guess this is where I should tell ya'll I am an Army Veteran. Stayed in four years way back in the 80's. I will be the first to tell you I didn't make a very good soldier because I really hate people telling me what to do and I have this annoying tendency to question authority. Not skills needed for a life in the military. It was a good starter career. Gave me lots of perspective, and more than anything else, gave me the uncanny ability to tell a lie from the truth the second it comes out of some one's mouth. Had some good times, made some good friends. Learned many novel and exciting ways of blowing stuff up and doing people in. Those are a couple of skills I really haven't had a chance to use in civilian life, however if the occasion does arise, I'm ready.

So, back to the VA. The VA, while making great strides in health care for women veterans, still has a few kinks to work out of the system. Take, for instance, mammograms. At today's walk in visit my health care provider reminded me of tomorrows appointment for a mammogram. Would have been nice if they had told me about it a bit sooner.

Two years ago I got my notice from the VA for my mammogram. The test is not done at the VA hospital, but offsite. Mine was suppose to be done at the Mississippi Cancer Center, just two blocks down from the VA hospital. I got up there in plenty of time for the appointment, which was probably a good thing, because I was informed that the MCC no longer did mammograms for the VA. Then who did? They really didn't know, I'd have to contact the VA. Get in my little car, go back to the VA, find a customer service rep who wasn't filing her nails or checking her myspace page, gave her the appointment slip, and ask where I was suppose to be. Turns out it's at a hospital clear across town in a very very questionable neighborhood. Jackson, Mississippi has one of the highest murder rates for a city its size in the country, and this hospital is right in the middle of gang central. Still haven't figured out why the VA, in all it's infinite wisdom, sends women to one of the most dangerous neighborhoods in Jackson for mammograms. And they're still doing it. I made sure my this years appointment was in the morning, as that is not a neighborhood you want to be caught in after dark.

The VA has put up a picture of our new commander in chief in the lobby. I think they could have got a better picture. This one makes him look like a total dweeb. When I walked by I saluted my commander in chief. Just a habit I've had since the Regan administration. He gets the same salute the rest of them got, and it doesn't involve all the fingers of my right hand. It was sort of an automatic gesture. It seems that the only thing that ever happens at the VA are budget cuts. Not a good thing at best of times and certainly not during a time of war, when we have kids coming back from overseas wounded and missing body parts. When the commander in chief makes VA health care a priority, instead of spending billions of dollars to bail out a bunch of corporate raiders, then maybe, just maybe, I'll change my salute.

It's been a week since Obama took office. So far I haven't seen any unicorns, or fairies, or pixies spreading pixie dust around. I was expecting an immediate plethora of sunshine and rainbows and money falling from the sky. It's cold and grey and foggy and the only thing that's fell out of the sky so far has been rain and pigeon poop. If there are any stars rising in the East, it's been too cloudy to see them. I can't wait for the day this news media lovefest is over, and all the journalists and pundits come to the startling conclusion that Obama is only human, just like everyone else, and is going to make mistakes. I only hope that when he does, it won't cost the lives of any American soldiers or civilians.

Hi Ya'll

And welcome to The Crippled Mockingbird blog spot. This is my very first attempt at being a blogger. I will be scanning the internets to bring to you the true, the weird, the strange and the just plain damn stupid, and from where I'm sitting, there's plenty of it out there. If in my quest for information I manage to embarrass, annoy, offend, or just plain piss somebody off, then my job is done.

Today, it's raining here at the old Flying Turtle Farm. All the goats are huddling in their little goat sheds, trying to decide if it's going to be cold enough tonight to drop their kids. My husband is trying to fix the washing machine. He's got a manual. And tools. And so far hasn't had to make one trip to hardware store. I think the aliens have replaced him with a pod person.

I turned 50 in October and I'm kinda having a midlife crisis. One of these days I'm going to have to grow up, it just isn't going to be today. I live in the middle of nowhere, in Tylertown, Mississippi, home of rednecks, retards, Katrina refugees who I wish would go back to New Orleans and stay there, Southern Baptists, Pentecostals, good old boys, good old girls, more ministers from more religions than you can shake a stick at, and me. With the exception to the aforementioned Katrina refugees who I really wish would go back to New Orleans, like it's been nearly 4 years already, go home, I'm related to damn near everyone in the county, by blood or marriage, and that includes the black ones that no one else in the family wants to admit to. I mean it's so bad that I had to import a husband from California. I don't care if it is legal, dating your first cousin is just gross.

My daddy is 89 years old and still thinks he can drive. My auntie, his baby sister, is 79 and still thinks she can drive. Good that both of them ended up buying the same kind of car. Folks around here have that old pattern recognition thing going own. For their own safety, every time they see a brown Mercury Marquis, they automatically give them the right of way. When the two of them are not arguing, they are doing their best to put me in the nervous hospital. Got news for them, as long as they're making Zanex, I ain't going nowhere.

Anyhow, looks like I need to get to making dinner. Gonna have to post this link somewhere and have folks stop in and read all this stuff. I figure it'll be great evidence for my sanity hearing.

Ta-Ta for now, ya'll.